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 Post subject: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 9:42 am 
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I have a bit of a rant. I'm going to be controversial (and lengthy), i'm warning you now...

In case you all dont know or have been under a rock for the past month or so, Ray Rice of the Baltimore Ravens is hot water for a domestic altercation between he and his wife. He was recently given a 2 game suspension by the NFL which by all accounts was not received well by the general public.

Stephen A. Smith, made some Comments regarding the matter and was reprimanded yesterday as a result. I totally disagree with ESPN. when it comes to his firing. But that's a whole different topic...

So that's the back story. Here's my comments....

I could've done this on FB but I dont care for the diatribes on social media unless it's in article form. I have a real problem with this WHOLE story and the media propaganda behind it. Stephen A. made a comment that basically said that woman shouldnt provoke violence and I wholeheartedly agree. Let me preface this before I go any further. I grew up in a house with 4 women: My mom and my 3 sisters. I grew up with an understanding that you dont hit a women. I still abide by this mantra and have never ever laid a hand on a woman. Not because "it's a woman" but because you generally should hit another person, right?

This topic upsets me because of all the self righteousness and all the male villifying that permeates within this issue. It seems as though a woman can do whatever she wants to a man but as soon as a man physically responds then thats the point of demarcation. No matter what preceeded a man hitting a woman, as soon as he does, he is now the villain and that's just not right. Stephen A Smith said it best, at what point do we ask questions about what the woman did to contribute to the altercation? When do we start to consider that maybe she did infact provoke a man to hit her. Either way, there is a serious double standard when it comes to domestic violence that is indicative in the opinions of people when it comes to domestive altercations. How do we basically ask a man to show extreme restraint and control in adverse conditions and then tell the women "do what you want" because that's basically what we're doing.

Look, we live in a society (especially now) where inclusion and equality is the standard. Black or white, gay or straight, young or old, it doesnt really matter nowadays. We're all supposed to be considered equal right? Not when it comes to domestic violence. Women can't have it both ways. You can't fight for women to be equal to men when it comes to the good things (job consideration, pay, rights) and then when it comes to the bad stuff (domestic violence and criminal matters) expect to get treated like a women. If we're going to be "equals" then damnit we're equal. If you're a woman and you hit a man, you should be villified as if you are a man and vice versa. You shouldnt be able to haul off and hit a guy, spit in his face, punch, kick and we've got to sit there and take it but the moment we shove, push, or hit you, we're the worst guy on the planet. That's my whole point. I keep hearing, media pundits say "under no circumstances should you hit a woman..." and i'm sitting there like :confused: ..."are you gonna finish that statement?" ...."and a woman under any circumstances should never hit a man...".

I'll conclude this wednesday morning rant by saying that, I dont ever condone a man hitting a woman. It is disgusting. However, I find just as digsuting when a women does just the same. That's how we should ALL think. It can't be this one-sided thing that it's been since forever. Man get the short end of the stick a lot when it comes to domestic violence and that's because we've programmed it our childres heads our sons and daughters thats it's not right for a man to hit a woman, when we SHOULD be teaching that's it's not right for a man to hit a woman or a woman to hit a man. It's a very simple elementary school rule that adults seem to walk right by, "Keep you hands and your feet to yourself". It's never that easy though right?


Thoughts?

And keep real with me...

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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 10:54 am 
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I have not heard nor seen Stephen A's remarks but I do agree with you 100%! There is a double standard out there that women like to run to when things get out of the way. I am like you asking the question "What was done to provoke the situation?", let's look at the entire altercation and not just the end result. I have my opinions about other things that women usually try to hide behind without taking responsibility for there actions and yes I know that we live in a society where people in general do not like to take responsibility for their own actions so do not misunderstand my statement about women.


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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 12:55 pm 
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He said it the wrong way. Provoke was too general and it's used by abusive dudes as an excuse to beat women. This is really why he's (Smith) being hammered. But I find no issue with his basic premise. If a woman hits a dude or gets into a fist fight with him and he hits her back...

Then again if a woman pushes you and she ends up with a busted lip and broke ribs, or knocked out, then it might not matter whether she hit you first.

Bottom line: Don't think you can hit folk and expect not to be hit back. I think that's what he was trying to say. Then again, if you know you can beat the woman down with your pinky finger, then don't knock her out either.

Maybe the woman did hit the guy, but the video footage of him draggin her out the elevator wasn't a good look. Maybe his case would be different if she'd broke his nose and knocked his teeth out.


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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 1:11 pm 
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My argument isnt what happened with Ray Rice. What he did was wrong.


I have a problem though when something like that happens and no matter what preceeded it, that moment in which a man hits a woman is the point of demarcation. That's the point where they stop asking questions about the what the woman did and start focusing on the man and what he did. It's wrong.

I've never been in an altercation with a women so I cant say what it's like to be in the heat of the moment like that. I do know this, it is entirely unfair for society to ask a man to show self-restraint to a woman and then tell a woman that basically you can do what you want because he cant touch you. If he hits you at any point he's going to jail and not one question will be asked. I've seen too many duded get roped off because some female started pushing buttons (or in Stephen A.'s words "provoked the situation"). Clearly a woman has no self retraint when she hits a man but for some odd reason a man is expected to have extreme self-restraint. Double standard like a mug.

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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:04 pm 
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I'm sorry, I thought that was First Take.... Ms. Champion didn't seem offended because she knew what he meant.

They need a disclaimer before the show anyway.

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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Fri Aug 01, 2014 8:06 am 
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It IS sad, and as a commentator said on CNN (I believe), you need to keep this conversation going. I agree with it. However, the conversation needs to get a little deeper than it is, and get to the root cause of the altercation, not the end result.

Did he provoke her? Did she provoke him? What was it that even led them down this road? Once you dig a little deeper, you're closer to coming to some conclusion that will be fair to both parties, regardless of who is on what end.

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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 1:48 pm 
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Instad of plotting through what I've already said on the subject, I'll just invite you all to go HERE.

Somewhere in there is my response (hint: look for the guy in my sig)

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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2014 9:41 am 
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The footage from the elevator is out floating around. Not a good way to start the season. It just opened up for ol dude all over again.


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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2014 2:00 pm 
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Apparently the ravens couldn't do a second round. He was cut today.


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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2014 6:54 pm 
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I pay a lot less attention to morals or the right and wrong in these situations and a lot more attention to the money. If his playing ability is crucial, then nothing he did was bad enough. But if public opinion threatens the finances of the organization, then what he did was completely unacceptable on our team and in the league. The matter here was not THAT he hit her and knocked her out. The matter is that WE the mainstream audience SAW it. THAT is how the Pro Mandingo Fighting industry works.


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 Post subject: Re: Ray Rice - ESPN - Stephen A.
PostPosted: Thu Sep 11, 2014 12:32 pm 
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Heads will roll for this...

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